A Not So Little Girl
by Magicks and Vengeance
Summary: Kennedy's POV on the Slayer's little sister. Dawn/Kennedy. Work in progress.
1. Part 1

Notes: My second Dawnedy! I hope it's decent. It's going to be a multiple parter, and I'm actually putting it in the WIP section this time... It'll probably end up having three to five parts, but I'm still not sure...   
  
  
  
  
If I had thought things were strange around here before, I was extremely mistaken. Things were about to get stranger, and due to just one addition to the already over-full house.   
  
The minute Faith walked in the door, everyone was drawn to her. Not in a sexual way, at least not most of them. But, there was just this essence about her, it screamed for everyone to look, and pay attention. Willow once said I reminded her of Faith. But I didn't have this effect on people. Hell, I wasn't a slayer yet either. And maybe I never will be.   
  
But everything became so different from that day on. The reality that Willow and I were pretty much over finally smacked me in the ass. Had we ever really had anything going for us but lust? I doubt it. She was too busy being torn between her dead girlfriend and Xander's ex-fiancé to have time to fall in love with me. And I'd never really had any time to fall in love with her, either. But it had been nice while it lasted. I just had mutual lust with a really hot girl. And it, in time, was gone. And seeing her chasing after that Anya chick doesn't hurt as much as I thought it would.   
  
And everyone else was all busy. My peers were busy training day and night, getting ready for something we'd never be ready enough for. Xander, Giles, Andrew, and Spike never really crossed my mind, they were guys, and even though they were around all the time, it was easy to ignore them. And Buffy and Faith were too busy trying to dislike each other to notice anyone else. So that only left one person. Dawn.   
  
Buffy's little sister had crossed my mind more than a couple times. She was extremely pretty. Not the kind of girl you'd lust after, but just a beautiful girl you could fall in love with. It was odd, really. I wasn't really the falling in love type, more the lusty random relationships with random hot girls type. I'd only ever been in love once, and that hadn't worked out. And I'd been trying to distance myself from little Dawn, who really turns out, isn't that little anymore. Not that I really knew her when she was younger, but everyone always treats her like the probably used to. When Buffy first became the slayer, and moved to Sunnydale and met her friends, Dawn was still young. But don't they see that she's older now? She isn't a little kid anymore. She's become a woman.   
  
Which would be exactly why I need to distance myself. I can't let myself fall in love again. Love isn't an option for me anymore, I'm satisfied well enough without it. And the last person I need to fall in love with is the oldest slayer's younger sister. Who, in fact, seems very straight. And I really don't need to give Buffy more of a reason to dislike me, although at times, I could care less what she thinks of me.   
  
Then again, what could she say about it anyway? 'Don't be gay with my sister, it's wrong'? Of course, that would be assuming I had any chance and that I'd let myself give in, but honestly... After what I've seen of her and Faith, she'd have no room to talk.   
  
But why do I worry about it? It's not like any of this is ever going to happen. Even if I had a chance, I sure as hell am making sure I'll never be tempted to take it. Too many things could go wrong. With this huge apocalypse coming, the last thing I need to worry about is a serious lover.   
  
Of course, the temptation is always there. I live in the same house as her, for god's sake. It isn't easy to get away. Especially with her many attempts to befriend me and the other slayers in training. Can't she see I just want to be left alone now? Or maybe that's why she's doing it, she's afraid for me or something. I'll be okay, girl, really. I'll be fine if you just let me be.   
  
But, with a knock on the open door of the spare bedroom I've been laying in alone, I look up and see her standing there. And I know things aren't that easy, no matter how much I'd like them to be.  
  
  



	2. Part 2

Notes: I finally got out another part, yay!   
  
  
  
"Are you okay?" she asks softly. I've heard this from her many, many times before. She seems to be always too concerned about me. "Yeah, I'm fine," I answer, looking back down so we are no longer making eye contact. "Are you sure? Because I always ask you this, I know, and you always say you are. But you really don't look it."   
  
I shake my head. "I'm sure I'm fine, Dawn. Don't worry about me so much." She shrugs. "I can't help it. You seem like an outsider these days. And in this house, with this many people, it's gotta be hard. There has to be someone you'd like to hang out with." I shake my head again. "I feel better hanging out on my own," I tell her, hoping she'll get the hint. She does.  
  
"Don't think it'll be that easy to get rid of me. I honestly plan on staying here until I get *something* out of you," she replies. She's stubborn, like her sister. "I swear there's nothing we need to talk about. I'll be fine, if everyone just leaves me be." Dawn sighs. "I don't believe that," she states. I know that she doesn't believe me, and I know that she shouldn't. But I really just wish she would. I don't need anybody getting inside of my head right now. I'd rather they just judge me from the outside. Who I am now is who they need me to be, with all this evil around. If she breaks me, I could be useless.  
  
"I don't want to talk. I don't think I'll ever want to talk. Why are you so insistent that I do?" Dawn shrugs, again. "I don't know. I just don't like seeing people all depressed-like and anti-social. It makes things better around here when everyones at least a little happy. And I haven't seen you smile since a few days before Faith came." I lifted my head back up and looked at her. "You know what happened then," I say, giving her an icy look. Her eyes widen.   
  
"I know, I know. Don't get mad. But you did say that it didn't bother you. Though seeing as you're also trying to convince me there's absolutely nothing wrong with you now, maybe I shouldn't believe you." I roll my eyes. "I'm already mad at you for bothering me, you know that. And anyway, I swear I was telling the truth. It doesn't bug me. She's happy now, and what we had wasn't anything more than lust, if you can relate." She frowns. "Well, I can't say I've ever been in a relationship based on lust, but I've experienced it before. I guess I understand. She is happy now, even if its a bit weird to the rest of us. Who would've thought, you know? Xander's ex and his best friend!"  
  
I give a weak, fake smile at her attempt to lighten up the mood. "I wouldn't really know, I haven't been here for very long. Besides, didn't she want Xander himself for a time there?" Dawn nods. "Yeah, I remember her boy days. Even though I technically wasn't there for them. But I know she wanted Xander for a long time. He was just too interested in everybody else to notice it. Then she found Oz... There was a bit of trouble there, when Xander finally did realize what he had sitting in front of him. But that blew over, and Oz ran off in their first year of college. And then she was with Tara, until a year ago..."   
  
That's another thing I like about Dawn. In reality, I secretly love the fact that she keeps bothering me, even though I know it could possibly lead to bad, terrible things. But I really love her outlook on her life. From what I get out of all of it, she was created out of some sort of mystical energy to open some portal between worlds, and was sent to Buffy two or three years ago. And she jokes about remembering things she knows she wasn't even there for. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be able to handle knowing I wasn't exactly "real," if you want to put it that way.   
  
She had been silent, waiting for me to say something, but then she looked sad. "I miss her," she says, as if she's admitting to something horrible. "Miss who? Willow?" She shakes her head. For some reason, I knew who she was talking about, but didn't feel like admitting it. "No, Tara. I miss her a lot. And sometimes I wonder what things might be like, if she was still around. Would Willow have flipped out over something else? Would it have still been as bad? Would she have gone to England anyway? Would they still be together? Still live here?"   
  
Now she was pretty much talking to herself, and I think she knew it. She was aware that I had never known Tara and she wasn't a concern of mine. Sure, I felt bad that this woman everyone had liked so much was dead, but I couldn't help but not be affected too much by it. "I guess I shouldn't think about these things. Buffy tells me not to, that it just makes it hurt more. But I can't help it, I loved Tara, she was a great friend. And now she's gone forever, just like my mom. But she was there for me when my mom died. When she died, it seemed like nobody was there, since Willow was freaking out beyond belief, and everyone was all worried about her..."   
  
She had been staring at the floor, while I watched her go on and on about this dead person I never knew, only half listening. But then she stops, and quickly looks up. "I'm sorry for bothering you, but I'm not even really talking to you anymore. I'm going to go, I think I need to talk to Willow," she blurts, giving an apologetic smile, and rushing out the door.   
  
Letting my head fall back onto my hands, I sigh. And I wonder how long it will take before this Summers girl breaks me. 


End file.
